There are two vocations that appeal to me: (1) the classroom teaching Scripture to students and (2) the local church being involved in her mission to my neighbors. There are two aspects of these vocations that do not appeal to me: (1) closing the door of an office to do research so I can write papers that will be read by a handful of other academics for an entire career or (2) being so busy in the day-to-day of a local church that I can merely sigh when I think of spending time in serious study. I don’t want to be a pure academic, but neither do I want to pastor (at least as it is pictured in contemporary culture).
If I could dream for a moment I would be part of a think tank and I would live in San Francisco, CA. Why a think tank? So I could write and do research on topics related to biblical studies, Christian thought, and the mission of the church. I would still write papers and books. I would still go to conferences like AAR, ETS, and SBL. I’d teach either local classes for pastors or adjunct elsewhere. In doing so my heart for the city would find rest in a place that is far from Christianized.
It is a nasty job market out there. I don’t think I have what it takes to enter the cut throat competition necessary for many of those jobs (let alone the qualifications). Likewise, I don’t think I can muster the confessional compromise that other schools would ask (“to teach here you must believe, A, B, C, D….”) since I don’t fit into any particular denominational bubble at this time.
So what is one to do without a tribe, without those stunning qualifications that sets them apart from the rest, with an urge to teach, and with a heart for the local church in a urban context like San Francisco?
I know people have done something like what I want to do. Christopher J.H. Wright comes to mind. He lives in London, England. He has a heart for third-world Christianity and global missions. He is involved in academics through writing and I assume teaching. But what would it take to land an opportunity like this?
Several times I’ve talked with my wife about moving back to San Francisco because our heart is there (begin playing cliched song now). We feel like we belong in the least “churched” city in North America. Likewise, I feel led to further academic work after I complete my Master of Theology (Th.M.) degree. In some sense we believe there may be opportunity for both, though we are not sure how (especially with the Bay Area being so expensive and the lack of jobs related to the vocation I am pursuing). Neither of us feel like pastoral work in a local church is our primary calling/gifting/interest. If only I knew the future.
In some sense this is a whole lot of personal baggage to share with the blogosphere, yet it has been readers of this blog and other bloggers who have been so very helpful in recent years. Whether I am in need of an article, a book, or something else it has been quite a resource to post something on this blog and hear wisdom and advice from other sources.
So let me open the door for the creative thinking of others. What could you imagine with me? What could reconcile a love for academia and a love for urban missions in the Bay Area? What kind of “third-way” (between professor and pastor) vocation could exist if it were merely created? I’d like your thoughts.
the archives near Emmaus 
I pretty much have the same exact compulsion: To study and yet pastor, but not totally one or the other. But of course, I’m at a much younger stage than you are. At any rate, one person that comes to mind who involves (or involved) himself in studying/teaching and yet other missional work (pastor/global missionary) is Tony Campolo. I can’t think of anything that he has written that might help you, but I know that he is (or used to be) both a professor and a pastor and yet was still involved with global missions. Not sure if that really helps, but it might.
As for what I could imagine you doing in San Francisco? I have no idea, haha. One thing that an Episcopalian priest once told me, though, was to live out the question rather than ask it. You would know the details of how that might happen better than anyone else, but the advice has always been helpful for me. Whatever you decide to do, though, please keep blogging 😉
Hey Brian, First let me say that you and Miranda are in our prayers, whatever your future endeavors may be, and that selfishly we hope that ends up being here in SF.
You have articulated the challenges quite well that I have had far back when I decided to go to bible school over law school. Both will cost quite a bit, one will have a cash dividend, and the other not so much. So how does one think of children, family, sustaining themselves and still do what they enjoy and are passionate about? I haven’t completely answered this question for myself, and my studies have been much slower than your own (for context sake). Fortunately, I fell into an insurance career that has taken care of me, that I somewhat enjoy, and that allows me to live in The City and pay its rent.
Options for you would include getting involved in a nonprofit that brings restoration to the City, becoming a spokesperson for such causes, you could be an adjunct professor and a part-time whatever… before all is said and done, I would surely hope you write, and by writing I’m not referring just to your blog that many of us enjoy, but perhaps a book.
Since you guys don’t feel called to pastor (though you clarified “in the contemporary meaning of the word”), it narrows the field quite a bit. SF could use qualified pastors such as yourself. We will continue praying and “imagining” with you.
Blessings brother…
I tend to share your angst… I think it reveals that some of us are cutting new paths as these things have not been the norm in the past. It’s tended to be more of an either/or but more are wanting to do a both/and approach to all this. But that can be hard to do when there are bills to pay. In the end I still say follow your heart and passion and let the rest work itself out.
Why not become a professor who teaches those who will fill the pulpits? You could possibly be a pastor to future pastors in a sense. You could also do research, writing, and pulpit supply as time would permit.
It’s funny, the greatest theologians have often been those involved in the day-to-day, seemingly endless demands of the pastorate, and the greatest pastors have usually been creative, insightful theologians. The seminary-life seemed far to restrictive and limited–too much exclusiveness, and the idea of spending my days relating to Christians alone, and rarely non-Christians seemed boring to me. And I’m not sure that genuine creativity of thought is truly encouraged and rewarded in seminaries and bible colleges. So, the risks and challenges of the pastorate were compelling, and still are, to Sharon and me. I wonder if you have a clear idea on what is involved in the pastoral ministry? The “day to day” of it is actually pretty nice; I study as much as I like, and am in control of my schedule from the time I wake up until I go to sleep at night. I know other pastors and their churches have a time-clock mentality–but that’s their choice to live that way, and it doesn’t work!
For me, the decision was to go the direction that God called me to, and I would warn anyone against pursuing either if he/she views them as “professions,” and not a clear, divinely-communicated calling from God. If you don’t see God’s hand leading you, and even doing some miracles in you, your family, and the ministry…then, well, you can at least hope He’s involved in the affair, at least through His providence, though distant. If you take on the role of teaching, or pastoring without the clear knowledge that God Himself personally called you to it, you will lack the kind of confidence you need to do the job. With respect to other respondants to this post, I would NOT give much thought as to the geographical location, job market status, economic climate, or even to the “church’dness” of the city–those things are not really our business, but God’s. We Christians have bowed to the “unchurched city” concept for too long. (Am I the only person who notes that our nation’s “unchurched cities” are usually really cool places to settle down and live? You can’t swing a cat here without hitting two church-planters who have come here to “bring Jesus to Portland”–whether Portland wants them or not!)
I would not seek the answers immediately in online discussion or with peers and people, but would get alone with God, fast and pray–and wait for His leading in the matter. If He doesn’t speak to you in that way, and under those circumstances–you’ll spend the rest of your career/life in either of these roles frustrated and uncertain of why you are where you are, and what you need to be doing, and you probably won’t have much to say to folks.
But for now, we sure appreciate you and Miranda, and your ministries to us at Grace, and every Sunday you are having a tremendous impact on those who come to your class, Brian! God will lead you, as we pray with you, at the right time, and to the right, perfect, place and people.
Jeremy: I have not read much of Campolo (other than Adventures in Missing the Point co-authored with Brian McLaren). I may have to browse some of his writings for ideas. You are right that this may be a case of living out the question since it may be one of those things where the answer unfolds only after the process begins!
James: I’d have to be careful when getting involved in a non-profit. I spent many years in various non-profits, my last being an absolute physical and emotional drain that I couldn’t handle again. So in part it would depend on the task at hand.
When I shrink away from the traditional pastorate I mean the one where the pastor is (A) therapist; (B) property manager; (C) financial officer; (D)…..eventually prayer, Scripture, and study are just one of many other requirements. If there was a way to avoid this, and my wife wanted to be in a role that I would never force on her, then maybe some form of pastoral work would be an option.
Brian F.: That may be the case! Thus far I’ve gone where the journey has taken me, but sometimes I need to talk it out to maintain confidence to move forward!
Jason: If the job opened I’d take it. Sadly, the Bay Area doesn’t have many options so if we did go back home it could be difficult to find that role.
Ken: True, most of the great theologians in the early days were pastors (Irenaeus, Athanasius, Basil, Augustine….) so it is sad that church and academy are often divorced. Likewise, I don’t like the idea of being part of Christendom away from the world. While I don’t know a lot about pastoral work, I do know many pastors who seem so, so busy that they don’t get to read and write like they would if church tasks weren’t piling up.
You are right that it must be a call. I don’t know that SF is a call because of the unchurchedness and much as it is home and it is where our hearts remain. That doesn’t mean God will take us there, but it seems like the most obvious direction to go.
And I agree an open forum is not a good basis for decision making. It won’t be, but many of the people I’ve met through this blog have become as good or better discussion partners about many things than people I know in flesh and blood (I may be a product of my social media generation).
Thank you to you and Grace for giving us a home away from home to think through these issues and stay involved while we seek the direction of the Spirit.
Well, brother, you know where my heart lies with it all concerning you. I know more great theology teachers than I do pastors, so I am delighted to see your natural and God-given skills grow in effectiveness each week as you help me pastor our little flock! Either way, you know you’ll end up doing both, you know.
BTW, wld you plz send me personal contact info? Sharon and I are at the coast, are trying to put together a getaway for a few of us in the fall, want to run some dates by you and M.
Got cut off…by me. I know more great theology teachers than I do pastors, so I am delighted to see your natural and God-given skills grow in effectiveness each week as you help me pastor our little flock! Either way, you know you’ll end up doing both, you know.
BTW, wld you plz send me personal contact info? Sharon and I are at the coast, are trying to put together a getaway for a few of us in the fall, want to run some dates by you and M.
Got cut off…. Either way, you know you’ll end up doing both, you know.
BTW, wld you plz send me personal contact info? Sharon and I are at the coast, are trying to put together a getaway for a few of us in the fall, want to run some dates by you and M.
Geez. Sorry!
I can email it to you. 😉
Brian,
I don’t know whether this might be an opportunity or not, but something like Credo House Ministries might fit the bill. They currently have one “Credo House” in Oklahoma, but have plans to expand to a number of cities over the next few years, and will need Fellows to coordinate outreach, teaching, coffee-brewing, and a plethora of other stuff. Again, I don’t know how you might fit theologically with them, though they say they’re open to a spectrum within “mere Christianity.”
If you’re unfamiliar with them, the links below give a good overview:
http://www.reclaimingthemind.org/blog/2011/06/the-future-of-the-credo-house/
http://www.reclaimingthemind.org/blog/2011/07/credo-house-fevor/
http://www.reclaimingthemind.org/blog/2011/07/what-is-a-credo-house-fellow/
Blessings!
– Tim
Tim,
Thanks for the recommendation. It is worth looking into!
Brian,
I would say my disposition is much like yours as you share your desires. I find the dichotomy between church and academy to be unfortunate–and yet there are probably some pluses. I would simply say keep pressing the Lord on what he has for you; in my personal experience it never ends up looking the way we would imagine or dream. When you find something like what you’re looking for, would you let me know; I would like to sign up for that myself 🙂 . . . I’ve been looking ever since my seminary days, and I’ve ended up here (the blogosphere).
Bobby: True, it does turn out different than what we plan. I am thankful that I can trust God. Like you the blogosphere has proven to be a good outlet.
Thanks for posting this Brian. I can certainly echo similar thoughts and frustrations, as many others do.
It’s terrifying at times to think about starting on a long, expensive path through seminary without a more specific calling than to teach God’s Word and love people. Every now and then I’m blessed with moments of peace when I realize that as I work to prepare myself for that future, and to fulfill that calling as I’m able to now, God will lead me where he wants. It’s also terribly exciting to know that God could take us anywhere, to do anything, providing that he leads us to that position, ministry, city, etc.
More often, unfortunately, I question this path, the length of it, however I will pay for it, and how it will affect my wife and I. All good things to seriously ponder, but not at the expense of trusting God to continue to lead us, as he has done so far. 1 Samuel 7:12 is a great encouragement to me.
Luke: It is worth weighing the cost. I’ve seen good people make big mistakes in the name of “calling” and “God said” that have led to family pain, financial troubles, and so forth. So I would say it is just as much an act of faith to question one’s self to make sure one is no speaking for God as it is to act upon a calling one believes is from God.
I completely agree, and didn’t mean to imply otherwise.
@Luke and @ Brian: You are both so gifted and talented, just keep going the direction that you’ve both chosen, and you can trust Him to let you know when there’s turn ahead for you to take. The fields really are white for harvest, and He won’t waste your time or money in this affair, brothers!
@Luke: I didn’t think you were saying otherwise. I was just reiterating our shared point. 🙂
@Ken: Thank you for the encouragement!